For My Readers:

After several years of editing and re-editing my book, It Begins With You, 7 Simple Secrets to Your Family’s Joy , I have decided to put a condensed version of the book on my blog. I was not ready to do the whole publishing and promoting the book thing. However, after much thought, I felt I wanted to get my message out and not wait any longer.

I hope the messages resonate with you. I wrote them from a place of love. I believe we all would like to have more joy and happiness in our families, however, we do not know how to make that happen. Families do not come with joy manuals! To increase the level of joy and happiness in your family, it only takes one member to implement the 7 Simple Secrets. So, when you read this online book, you may find a few things you can do to create more joy for you and your family. It’s your choice!

If you are reading this blog, I believe you are ready to learn that your family’s joy starts with your joy. And, you are ready to know that your joy is contagious. Your family will benefit greatly by catching the joy that you are experiencing. You may come to a Secret that you do not agree with – that is OK. Please keep on reading and finish all of the chapters. Who knows? Maybe, one of these secrets is the one that will lead you to the peace and joy you deserve.

You will notice at the end of each chapter that there is a journaling exercise. If you want to get the most out of this book, purchase a journal and do the exercises at the end of each chapter. After reading all of the 7 Secrets, doing the exercises, and journaling, you have learned to respond differently to your world. Thus, creating more joy for yourself and your world.

I will be adding one chapter at a time to give you time to digest each chapter and journal your thoughts and experiences.

If, in the end, you only use one of the Simple Secrets in your life, this is fine. Use what works for you. Changing your response to life is not easy. Your level of joy is directly related to how you respond to every situation in which you find yourself. It is very rewarding and worthwhile. It was for me.

I am presenting these Secrets from a mother’s point of view to show you that you have choices in every area of your life to be happy or not. However, you do not need to be a mother to get the benefit from the Secrets. If you are a daughter, uncle, father, grandparent or the like, these Secrets will also work for you.

As a life coach, seminar facilitator and friend, I have introduced these 7 Simple Secrets to hundreds of people. Those who were ready to listen and implemented these words of wisdom have had the most amazing and joyful results. My hope for you is that you have more joy for you, more joy for your family, and lastly, more joy in your world.

In Joy,
Vicki

Recently I was reminded of one the greatest secrets to living a joyful life. It happened a couple of days ago. It was at Hayhouse’s “I Can Do It” pre conference workshop here in Las Vegas. There were several workshops to pick from to attend. I chose to attend Byron Katie’s Workshop. She (yes she) wrote the amazing book, Loving What Is. A few years ago while on a trip with a friend we listened to that book on tape. I really enjoyed listening to the way she interacted with the people she supported. She also uses a series of questions to bust at an untrue thought –which was somewhat like the Sedona Method technique I taught several years ago. At that time, I promised myself, if I ever had the chance to go to one of her workshops I would attend. Even though I knew what to expect I was quite excited to watch her in action, so my heart skipped a beat when I walked into the room last Friday morning.

Katie was warm and humorous as I remembered from her book on tape. The lovely lady that sat next me commented on Katie –“Have you ever noticed that people that are enlightened seem so peaceful and beautiful.” I had to agree Katie was all of those things. I thought to myself- Hey that is who I would like to be when I grow up and out of my EGO! HA! That is what “the work” has done for Katie. “The Work” is what she calls her process of busting those untrue thoughts that cause all our suffering. She helps you get to the point of choosing not to suffer by busting all our dark, unproductive, untrue thoughts. She did “the work” with several of the attendees. Let me tell you when most of the individuals worked with her there was definitely more laughing then crying. Busting an untrue suffering thought is quite freeing – along with the freedom comes the joy of not having that untrue miserable stuff in one’s mind. I saw it over and over again. A mind not full of untrue misery causing thoughts can be free to be in the now where all our joy really lives.

Katie was so insightful and compassionate. Her main message was to STOP BELIEVING YOUR OWN THOUGHTS!. The worst thing that can happen to us is our thoughts. WOW! As Katie did “the work” I saw that to be so true. She even worked with a woman that had been continually abused by her mother 55 years earlier. This woman was so full of anxiety she could not sleep or have a happy moment in her life. Those thoughts about being afraid of her now deceased mother continue to terrorize. Once she busted those negative thoughts that were true for her 55 years ago but were not true now. The tearful woman actually laughed and whole face changed from being constricted and harsh to soft and peaceful.

One of Katie’s insights that really resonated with me was this statement. One of the greatest secrets to a joyful life is “to want what you already have”. I love that statement because one of my own mantras is “to BE in my have and acknowledge what I have and enjoy it” I know when I in that place – my life is full of joy- I am peaceful and grateful.

A few years ago my husband and I took an amazing romantic vacation to Mexico to our time-share, which is a lovely 5 star hotel. The scary thing about that vacation was-it almost did not happen. We had not used our time-share points in a few years my husband- thought that since we were not using it, we should sell. He looked into selling and discovered that we would get pennies on the dollar for the place. At that moment he thought that buying the time-share had been the worse financial decision he had ever made. Discouraged he came to me to complain about be taking advantage of when we bought it. He hates it when as a smart intelligent person he thinks he has been ripped off. I saw the pain he was in and said. “Instead of complaining about the place why don’t we book a week and go.” He looked at me very surprised as though why hadn’t I thought of that. He then turned and left the room saying nothing more. About a half hour later – he walked into the kitchen were I was and happily proclaimed that – We were going to Mexico in April – yep he had a book a week on the oceanside of the property. I was elated and so was he. Right then and there – we both were being in our have- and wanted what we already had. We had such fun and joy on that vacation. Since then when we use or let family members use the time-share every year. And when we visit the property – he no longer thinks it to be the worse financial decision of his life – he believes to be the best! He busted the painful untrue thought that he had been ripped off and got to experience the place for what it really was a paradise and a true gift that keeps on giving us joy. In doing, so he got to experience wanting what he already had. So wanting what you already have and being in your have- can produce what I feel everyone wants a happy, joyful life.

What untrue thoughts are rolling around in your head that are not giving your joy? Like- I should be smarter. My body is unattractive. I am a failure. My father was cruel. I’ll never find a love like that again. My mother did not love me. My spouse needs to change. My boss is a jerk You get the picture. If those untrue thoughts that have been running your life in a direction you do not want to go. If you are interested in busting your painful thoughts and learning more about Byron Katie, go to her website, www.thework.org . See if you can bust out of those old unproductive thoughts in doing so you can positively change yourself and maybe the world! Then write me and tell me your story- I love to hear joyful stories!